Something I Wrote While Waiting for a Thing to Finish at Work

The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain. Which is why the lazy refrain something something discouraging words I am pretending to type some things here so I don’t look like I’m not working right now. Isn’t that something? Even though we have all of these snakes it seems like a waste. There should be a way to harness the power of these beasts. It’d be like solar power but snake based. That’s a thing right? IF not it should be and I’d be king of it. A damn hell ass king of goddamn hell ass snake powered electric knowledge juice. And there’d never be another problem in this town again. And if anyone looked at me sideways I’d fire my bazooka full of snakes at ‘em. And they’d totally be all “Arrgh! I’m covered with snakes now! Why?! What had I done to deserve such a terrible fate?! I never got to try pomegranate juice! Blargh!” And then I’d laugh all triumphant-like and stuff because I’d totally be all in charge and whatever. Yeah that’d be pretty neat. Animals don’t have Monday. That’s probably fun for them. Although they have to work all the time but also none of the time. But also also they have no concept of what “work” is. Hmm. I’ll ask an animal the next time I see one to be sure. I wonder if there’s a restaurant that serves nothing but peanut butter? Not different food items made from peanut butter just different kinds of peanut butter. If there is it’s probably in Japan because yep. Can can. Can you do the can can? Wafflebeans; are those a thing? Like maybe they’re jellybeans that taste like waffles? Or beans of concentrated waffle? Ugh this is taking forever. It’s no one’s fault. Just not in the mood I guess. Well I know. I’m not guessing. An entire mall that’s a Dawn of the Dead theme park/super fun activity centre thing? Have to pay a lot of people to be zombies though. But if you get the right people who want to do that kind of thing as clients you could pretty much charge them whatever and they’d pay it. There’s “lunch meat” but there’s no “breakfast meat” or “dinner meat”. Hmm. Still unsure about brunch. Aren’t you just having lunch with some random fruit in the mix? Even the fruit doesn’t want to be at brunch. Warning! Warning! Danger Will Robinson! It’s been a while since anyone made a good/awful guy in an obvious monster suit movie. Not that I’m aware anyway. It’s lunch time, I know that you’re going to lunch. You don’t have to tell me. Haven’t seen Twelve Monkeys in a while. Timing is everything they say… This is especially true of Pop Tarts. What if all cars were made for drag racing? There’d be shards of cars everywhere probably. Why was there never at least an animated special based on Clayfighter? Why wasn’t the N64 version of Clayfighter as good as it should’ve been? The controller? Now I’m just rambling. Yeah now because I wasn’t rambling before. Do people really need to specify “soft yogurt”? Be interesting if one of the trees outside just collapsed into the parking lot. Not maim or kill or even crush any cars just “Pow! Tree!” And then we could all take turns going outside for a few minutes and being all, “Well that is the damnedest thing…” And then there’d be like a bunch of people all arguing about what to do next and stuff. That’d be a welcome distraction. Ooh! Or if there were like horrible digital birds like in Birdemic attacking the building and we had to fight our way out. I have a blue-green gel pen. I don’t remember where- No. Yeah it was in someone’s drawer. I think I scavenged everything good from them by now.

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